Anxiety.

My heart is racing. I'm keyed up with adrenalin and can't sit still. I feel on the verge of tears, am snapping at everyone, and want to be left alone. I have no appetite. I cannot wait until this silent auction is over.

I'm going to a hot flow class in an hour. I'm going to walk to the studio with my music on full blast, then throw myself into the asanas with all my strength. I need to get out of my head. I need to get rid of this anxious energy.

In brief.

Back from the beach. A good time was by all, despite two overcast, cool days. That didn't stop the boys from getting the water. I got in one short practice mid-week, and two power walks with friends.
Got back to town on Saturday afternoon, and Lee left for Ft. Lauderdale on Sunday morning.

Yoga has just not been happening much this week - went to a Bikram class on Sunday morning and a vinyasa class on Monday morning. The vinyasa class is one of my favorites, but it's changing next week to "prana kriya" yoga, whatever the hell that is.

Otherwise, the Silent Auction is ruling my life. I'm not sure who's more ready for it to be over with, me or Lee.

Lee keeps complaining about how he's ready to be home, but he's also raving about the food where he's staying (some beach resort), went on a 3-1/2 hour bike ride yesterday, swam in the ocean today, and is getting room service. All he has had o do is give a presentation and hobnob with insurance executives. He comes home tomorrow evening. Thank god.

Beach bound, and, second series postures

It's been an insane week.

We're leaving for the beach tomorrow. Normally I am not one of those oh my GOD, I need a vacation type of people because I don't work, and I don't crave an exit from my daily life. I look forward to trips, don't get me wrong, but I am not usually dying to get away. Well, I am this time, that's for sure.

I practiced Sunday (hot flow), Monday and Tuesday (vinyasa) and didn't do anything Wednesday or Thursday except for work on the auction and pack. Well, I also got a pedicure and a haircut. Lest anyone think I am a total slave.

Went back to John's studio this morning. I confessed to him that I had two glasses of wine last night (really, it was closer to three - I went out with a friend whose niece and husband have just opened a new restaurant in town - we had dinner and wine at that restaurant) and I was afraid I would suck wind. Well, I wound up having a great practice, but John, saying that it was because I had too much wine and needed it, split us off into second series after standing today. They were at least a little familiar to me because occasionally on Saturdays he'll do the same thing, and he used to teach an Intro to Second class which I've taken once or twice. Also, some of the postures are familiar to me from the Bikram method. Anyway, maybe I should have wine the night before every practice, because I felt great.

I let Michael and Will and their friend Garland play games on my computer this afternoon after school. Every time I came over near the three of them, crammed into two chairs in front of the computer, I would catch this whiff of little boy funk....a mixture of feet, dirt, and, I'm not sure what else. It was just the essence of little boy. It's what Michael's room smells like if he stays closed up in there too long. Now, as I'm typing, I'm feeling a grubby film on my keys.

I'm planning to get together several mornings during our trip with a few friends and walk, but I'm also taking my mat in hopes that I'll get in a few short practices next week. Maybe...we'll see...